Marriage Musings

Falling down the rabbit hole of marriage


on March 2, 2011

Since the end of last year, my husband and I have been on a job hunt. After our last trip to Montana in August, we decided we did not want to wait to move back because we were tired of the drive. Our desire to be closer to family made us look into jobs and housing a lot sooner than we had planned. The type of job he was looking for was one that paid more than he is making now so we would have extra to save for a house and pay off my school loans. After applying for many jobs and being turned down as well as hearing nothing but crickets after an interview, he got a call.

This call was an offer to preach in a small town for considerably less than we were planning. At first I was a little freaked because I was worried about the money. Once I had time to let things sink in I tried to focus on J. I wanted to know what he thought, how he felt about it before I voiced my opinion. He doesn’t like it when I do that but I don’t want my thoughts to influence him too much. After much talking and praying it seems that he is leaning towards it more and more. He thinks it is where God wants him to be but it will be a step of faith for me. The part of me that is constantly thinking about the future and trying-to-plan-for-it-so-our-life-will-have-less-financial-difficulties-than-our-parents is telling me “don’t do it”. The other part of me, the voice of truth, reminds me that God has never let me down, let us down. No matter what, we have always had what we needed. That has allowed me to be content at this point to follow J where his heart is leading him.

There are times when our brains and our hearts disagree. Sometimes it is difficult to hear our hearts because our brains can be very loud. The important thing is to “pray without ceasing” (1 Thess 5:17 NAS). This allows our minds to calm down enough so we can hear our hearts. There will be many times in a marriage where the couple is confronted with what seems like only two choices. It is up to them to decipher which way to go. This process is not always easy, acutally, it usually isn’t. The point is to rely on God for direction.

I don’t know what the future holds for us but I do know that my husband has an amazing heart and a desire to share God with all people. He is a good example for me!

Next time you have some choices to make, make sure to include God in the process. He wants us to do His will not to live life solely for our own happiness. I hope that is an encouraging thought–in my experience, when I do His will, I am happy! 🙂

Say a prayer today asking God for wisdom in your decisions: “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you” (James 1:5).


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